Christmas and Winter Holiday Quotes
A collection of some of the best Christmas and winter holiday quotations including clever and serious passages by famous poets and writers, and funny and satirical sayings by well-known humorists and comedians. Useful for creative inspiration and for projects such as scrapbooks or using as signatures in online discussion forums and emails:
Humorous / Fun / Satirical Quotes
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“I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up – they have no holidays.” –Henry Youngman
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“Christmas is the season when you buy this year’s gifts with next year’s money.” –Author Unknown
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“The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn’t for any religious reasons. They couldn’t find three wise men and a virgin.” –Jay Leno
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“Christmas begins about the first of December with an office party and ends when you finally realize what you spent, around April fifteenth of the next year.” –P.J. O’Rourke
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“Come, woo me, woo me; for now I am in a holiday humor, and like enough to consent.” –William Shakespeare
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“No self-respecting mother would run out of intimidations on the eve of a major holiday.” –Erma Bombeck
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“Marry an orphan: you’ll never have to spend boring holidays with the in-laws (at most an occasional visit to the cemetery).” –George Carlin
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“Next to a circus, there ain’t nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit.” –Kin Hubbard
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“I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.” –Dick Gregory
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“A lovely thing about Christmas is that it’s compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.” –Garrison Keillor
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“A perpetual holiday is a good working definition of hell.” –George Bernard Shaw
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“If all the year were playing holidays, to sport would be as tedious as to work.” –William Shakespeare
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Poetic / Sentimental / Serious Quotes
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“There’s nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.” –Erma Bombeck
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“The holiest of all holidays are those kept by ourselves in silence and apart; the secret anniversaries of the heart.” –Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
————————————————————————————————————————— “Holidays – Have no pity” –Eugenio Montale
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“Isn’t it funny that at Christmas something in you gets so lonely for – I don’t know what exactly, but it’s something that you don’t mind so much not having at other times.” –Kate L. Bosher
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“Christmas is for children. But it is for grownups too. Even if it is a headache, a chore, and nightmare, it is a period of necessary defrosting of chill and hide-bound hearts.” –Lenora Mattingly Weber
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“Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love.” –Hamilton Wright Mabie
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“At Christmas play and make good cheer, for Christmas comes but once a year.” –Thomas Tusser
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“I wish we could put up some of the Christmas spirit in jars and open a jar of it every month.” –Harlan Miller
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“To many people holidays are not voyages of discovery, but a ritual of reassurance.” –Philip Andrew Adams
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“Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful.” –Norman Vincent Peale
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“Do give books – religious or otherwise – for Christmas. They’re never fattening, seldom sinful, and permanently personal.” –Lenore Hershey
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“Christmas gift suggestions:
To your enemy, forgiveness.
To an opponent, tolerance.
To a friend, your heart.
To a customer, service.
To all, charity.
To every child, a good example.
To yourself, respect.” –Oren Arnold
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“I sometimes think we expect too much of Christmas Day. We try to crowd into it the long arrears of kindliness and humanity of the whole year. As for me, I like to take my Christmas a little at a time, all through the year. And thus I drift along into the holidays–let them overtake me unexpectedly–waking up some fine morning and suddenly saying to myself: ‘Why this is Christmas Day!'” –Ray Stannard Baker
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“And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled ’till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn’t come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.” –Dr. Seuss
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“Perhaps the best Yuletide decoration is being wreathed in smiles.” –Author Unknown
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“Gifts of time and love are surely the basic ingredients of a truly merry Christmas.” –Peg Bracken
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“Christmas is doing a little something extra for someone.” –Charles Schulz
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“I do like Christmas on the whole…. In its clumsy way, it does approach Peace and Goodwill. But it is clumsier every year.” –E.M. Forster
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“Christmas is not a time nor a season, but a state of mind. To cherish peace and goodwill, to be plenteous in mercy, is to have the real spirit of Christmas.” –Calvin Coolidge
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“Christmas isn’t just a day, you know, it’s a frame of mind.” –George Seaton
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“Probably the reason we all go so haywire at Christmas time with the endless unrestrained and often silly buying of gifts is that we don’t quite know how to put our love into words.” –Harlan Miller
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“The only blind person at Christmastime is he who has not Christmas in his heart.” –Helen Keller
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“I have always thought of Christmas time as a good time; a kind, forgiving, charitable, pleasant time; the only time I know of, in the long calendar of the year, when men and women seem by one consent to open their shut-up hearts freely.” –Charles Dickens
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“Remembrance, like a candle, burns brightest at Christmas time.” –Charles Dickens
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“What is Christmas? It is tenderness for the past, courage for the present, hope for the future. It is a fervent wish that every cup may overflow with blessings rich and eternal, and that every path may lead to peace.” –Agnes M. Pharo